Peer Review in the Real World

Some academics seem to think peer review is a suitable way to establish knowledge, with a nod to “it’s not perfect”. But imagine applying it in the real world:

“We need to know more about Wodgets to feed the Widget project”

“OK, so what’s the plan for the investigation?”

“We’ll I’m going to get the team together, explain the problem and let them get on with it”

“Heh. So, how are you going to monitor progress?”

“Oh we’ll have a regular review document where they can publish what they’ve found out. It’ll need to be fairly brief, we don’t want everyone wasting time reading about everyone else’s work. We’ll get colleagues in the same field to select them by how interesting they are, but I don’t think we need to enforce any other requirements. It’ll take too long to see if it’s correct for example, no point in duplicating effort. And we’ll give credits to those who get articles published that will contribute to promotion. They’re all professionals, it won’t affect the areas they work in, the results, or team relationships at all”.

“Heh. Ha ha. What then?”

“Oh nothing extra. We’ll just keep doing that. If people read the review documents they might get around to critically examining some of the articles, but there’s no real need as it’ll get in the way of their work. If someone does happen to find something wrong, they can write an article for the next review document, and if it gets published then everyone who happens to read it will know about the correction. If they notice this affects some other work they can update that when they get around to it, and see about publishing that correction and so on”

“Ha ha ha ” (Collapses in gales of laughter). “And how will we know when we’ve established a reasonable knowledge base of Wodgets?”

“Ah when experts – those who have lots of credits – feel that the articles in the journals all say roughly the same thing, they’ll tell us that they all agree with how a Wodget works. We might see if some researchers on the Wadget project can drop in occasionally and agree with them.”

“Hoo brilliant! That’s fantastic!” (wipes away tears, snot and the coffee sprayed over the table) “Anyway what are you really going to do?”

“Follow the department’s standard quality process … “

“Oh how dull. Well carry on. Keep me informed as usual”

—–

Postscript: Academics are working on it

Fobbed Orfe

Everyday Common-or-Garden Binge Drinking

Some straightforward calculations for a pleasant evening at home; a G&T to start, a bottle of wine and a whisky before bed. Some people may prefer alternative tipples.

I’m using the ’standard’ measures and absorption rates such as those found on the BUPA site here or the NHS site here. Old estimates are 6 units per bottle of wine at around 8%; these days we expect about 9 units in a bottle of 12%. So let’s assume a glass of wine – a fifth of a bottle – is 2 units.

A gin and tonic on arriving home at 6pm: +2 units (a pub double) = 2 in body

Glass of wine cooking supper at 7pm: +2 units – 1 absorbed = 3 units in body.

A glass with supper at 8pm: +2 units; -1 = 4 units in body (just about in drivable limits, though of course I wouldn’t recommend it, oh no, etc)

Rest of bottle over evening until 11pm: +5 units – 3 = 6 units in body

Largish Whishky before bed: +2 unitsh = 8 in body

8 hours later, at waking up, none.

This is a daily total of 13 units, and there’s some leeway for a vodka in the morning cornflakes. Let’s add a pint at lunch during the week (3 units) and we’re daily drinking – without getting drunk – nearly twice the 8 units that might count as ‘binge drinking’.

For a week, assume similar on Friday evening but in the pub drinking beer, add a couple of relaxing pints in the pub on Saturday afternoon (6 units) watching the footie, and another bottle of wine on Sunday lunch and afternoon (9 units) with some friends, and we have a total of (26×5 + 19 + 21 = ) 145 units per week.

Of course these are simple calculations and there are lots of caveats for individual build, food, absorption rates, tolerence, getting-home times, preferences for sticky tongue, gummy eyes, etc, but most of us can clearly far far exceed the ‘recommended limits’ without at any time being drunk, or over the limit to drive during normal driving times.

Make of it what you will.

(ETA: of course, if you’re lying about it, you’ll need to drink twice as much)

Pissed Orfe

Shaken Orfe